Passion comes from strength, and though my muscles may not be up to par, they are iron-willed and defiant. My jaw is set, teeth grinning behind my stretched face, and I feel my eyes glaze over as my mind quickly comes to the forefront. I am entranced by visions of tiny workings in my head, of gears and bolts screwing together as they form a picture, a word, a sentence. All my thoughts flow from my brain to my heart. From there, they spew forth from my fingertips as I create the only way I know how. As science states, and I know true, my heart is the strongest muscle in my body.
My hands often cramp and seize and I shake them to get revitalized. The smudges from the ink blot my freckled, petite hands and stain my conscience. I am a writer by society’s records and dreamer by my own. I seek to create a world where science, money, and matter are mine to manipulate. My hands are instruments that I am still in the process of tuning, beginner tools that itch to create symphonies. Even still, I am not a player, rather, I am a conductor because until I understand the world’s musical fortes and pianos I cannot control it to do my bidding, and neither will anyone else.
I am fascinated by the looseness through which the world turns, the helplessness we have as we hurtle through space. Infinity is only a concept, time a measurement- the true meanings of words and nature astound and inspire me. I toy not with the trivial items but with the larger meaning that I know each individual leaf, tree, stone and human can have.
But, it is my heart that leads me through all of this, not my mind. My morals and my conscience allow me to become a person receptive to learning not only about people’s feelings but also about the world that dons those same feelings upon them. My heart is my guide down the river of life we float upon, stalwart against riptides and whirlpools that could lead it to destruction. Mortality is not a factor, intellect is a measurement not of worth but of ingeniousness, and my heart’s pathway is the only one I know to be true. Shakespeare wrote it himself- “To thy own self be true,” and as a girl who strives to create and destroy social rules, routines and restrictions, I understand and accept this. I train my mind and my muscles to coexist peacefully and wage what war I can on paper; I gain knowledge to learn about what this world is that I live in, and I prosper from my heart’s guidance into the ways of the world today. I am creative, passionate, lively, and smart all because I choose to be-I live my life with my heart faced forward because it is the only way I know how.
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