One Impulse - Tierney Ragsdale

Forced to look at your face

I chose to look in your eyes
I found there my every regret.

I sold myself to you
            For only the most empty of intimacies.

And I don’t want to run that reel of
Memories once more.

A dark night, twisted headlights
Beaming through the window,

A hand,
            Your skin,
                            My flesh.

The memory reel flashes through my mind
           Blinding any contentment
                                                 I achieve.

Blood runs rampant through my veings.
            Veiled eyes and covered ears catch only
                                       Inane details.
One swift movement, one impulse
                        And I’ve sold my soul.

Rushing thoughts of those memories
                       Never cease.
Daunting memories.
                       Thoughts of what could have been,

What should have been.

One impulse,
                That’s all it took.

And I am sold to you.

                          No refunds.

And a body sold to the night
             Is nothing worth living in.

Nothing any man would desire.
            I reside alone in
                                   The body I sold.

One impulse.
             A reel of memories that have no pause button.

I’ve lived in the memories,
                        Walked the world
                                         Cold and
                                                      Alone,

In this body I’ve sold.